Okay I finally watched the new Miley Cyrus music video I Can’t Be Tamed and I honestly don’t understand what all the fuss is about. Sure, she looks sexy but can’t we all agree it could be way worse?
So young, fresh and … dead behind the eyes?
But now I’m getting off track, back to the video:First, she’s wearing a one-peice, leotard-esque body suit not a two peice bra and panty number like we would expect from Gaga or Kesha. (I refuse to put that dumb dollar sign in her name. Real humans don’t spell their names with $. Go trip over your stripper heels and fall off my radar already.)
See, not so bad… and note the lack of bare midriff.
Second, the dance isn’t uber provocative, in fact it’s fairly tame for a video called Can’t Be Tamed. Plus, she looks great doing it! The costumes, the choreo, the set decoration… it’s hot and I actually think it’s a great video.
Now I will be honest, I never EVER thought I would actually defend Miley Cyrus, let alone in print, but people need to lay off the “she’s only 17 thing” – seriously. Sure, she’s seventeen years in age, but that is literally the only thing about her life that qualifies her as an average American teenager. What you didn’t have paparazzi stalking you at 17? And thank the sweet lord you didn’t. You can’t even try to tell me that you don’t have any skeletons in your high school closet… hiding where you keep all your mistakes… right between the platform sandals and camouflage cargo capris.
Bottom Line: It’s not fair that American consumers expect Miley Cyrus to compete with acts like Gaga and that walking, talking VD PSA (aka: Kesha) if she’s not allowed to play on the same field sexually and culturally. I mean honestly people, Dump$ter Diver is walking around in panties spouting lyrics about brushing her teeth with Jack Daniels. Doesn’t quite add up. So lay off the MTV and go back to your FOX news America.
Case and Point:
She’s a big dumb animal isn’t she folks!Seriously, does she just think the letter S has a line through it?
Please tell me I’m not the only one who noticed this. With the ridiculous amount of useless American Idol commentary a float in this here internet, why has no one pointed out that…
Contestant Casey James
is the identical male twin brother of…
none other than Taylor Swift??!?
Does no one see the uncanny hair-semblance? The glistening blonde. That effortless curl? Only Taylor Swift, Casey James and baby angels could have hair that perfect.
You heard it here first. Taylor Swift and Casey James: bastard twin children of the silky-smooth Michael Bolton.
Today I’m taking a page from my favorite SNL skit with Amy Poehler and Seth Meyers and saying:
Tyra Banks… REALLY??!!
Ms. Banks just signed a deal with Delacorte Press to write a series of Young Adult novels about young models in training with… you guessed it, SUPER POWERS!
Really, Tyra Banks? REALLY?? Just what we need, more literary toilet paper to litter the empty stalls of our youth’s lost appreciation for the written word. A little harsh? Maybe. But models with super powers? Come on.
Riiight, because being Amazonian tall, stick skinny, gorgeous and the object of international male affection isn’t powerful enough? Not to mention their abilities to survive for days on a diet coke and a cigarette. Now that’s a super power you can take to the bank. I can barely go an hour without a carb.
Alright Tyra Banks, you win again. World: 0 Tyra: 1
Adolescent girls, good luck.
Tyra Banks Lands Book Deal for YA Series “Modelland” – mediabistro.com: GalleyCat.
The perfect cake for a happy-go-lucky graduation party …emphasis on the lucky for my fellow classmates looking for jobs! Check it out here: Rainbow Brite Desserts!